ABOUT PIECES OF CARDBOARD... NEW HUMAN TAXONOMY

Ok, now it's time to push away the celebrity-oriented style of this blog and add a little of science to it. And there is no best way to do that than talking about a new way to classify people.

How did I came with this idea? It was Josh Swartzlander fault and Hannah Guillaume was also involved. Who are they? One of the two coolest and fucking awesome persons I know.

Hannah is the 'it' girl. I mean, she's got everything. I can't find the exact words to describe her. Let's just say that she is the kind of woman that it's inspirational and can appear at the TIME magazine cover and also can be the feature story of the Seventeen, COSMOgirl or Teen Vogue girl power special issue.

And I'm for real. Just imagine she's on my most-inspiring and admiration-deserved list, and all the persons who know me, can be sure that besides my mom, Frida Kahlo and Ruth Handler, the creator of the other timeless and boundaryless woman called Barbara Millicent Roberts, who is just worldwide know as Barbie, she's real.

Then, who is Josh Swartzlander?. He's the creator of the anti-everything concept. If globalization, merchandasing, consumism, stereotypes, pop music, Mary-Kate and Ashley, cartoons and popular culture have an enemy, he is the one. Today's teen and tween world have not to worry about sales, they better worry about him.

If MTV's Daria or Emily the Strange were looking for a boyfriend, he is the chosen one. But at the same time, that's why he is so interesting. He's real!!! He's the guy that it's inspirational.

I can tell without anydoubt he would be one of the most succesful persons I will ever known, of course, just besides me.

But anyway, better stop talking about these cool guys (they could think they deserve an altar or a whole shrine) and go to the point.

After knowing them I can tell that humans can be clasified in new categories:

- Pieces of cardboard: Human entities that have no reaction to the external environment. The few responses they have are limited to a couple of smiles and eye blinking as a result of the sympathetic nervous system responses. They have no feelings and their heart and brain are just kept as functional: pumping blood and transporting oxygen to cope with physical tasks.

They are likely to disagree with everything. An anticultural behaviour can be found on them in observance of little exposure to mass media, though they may have a kinda expertise in some areas like sarcasm. They have a dark sense of humor, majorily based on considering popular culture concepts' such as karma and kabbalh as BULLSHIT.

Can be easily recognized due to a high developed IQ that allows them to travel all over the world and win thousand-dollar-grant scholarships as well as getting internships and write awesome stories in a couple of minutes. Low emotional EIQ that is mainly used to ruin other people's feelings, believes and thoughts.

COOL PIECES OF CARDBOARD: The same as above, but in a Josh Swartzlander-style. That means it they are fucking awesome. I mean they behave that way due to the career path they want to achieve.

ME: I am beyond good an evil. When God or whoever created this world was thinking about someone different he couldn't think of someone but me.

LOTSA GORGEOUS LOVE,

Isaac.

Paris Hilton-inspired philosophy

When we think about philosophy it sounds really complicated and indeed it is. I can still remember those many courses that since high school involved guys like Plato, Aristotle, Nietzsche, Marx, Xirau, etc. But the strange thing is that I loved them. History of Philosophic Doctrines, Ethics, Axiology all of them dropped really interesting discussions and debates.

But after a couple of years dealing with those guys I’ve come up with a philosophy that’s sort of strange and wacky but cool. PARIS HILTON-INSPIRED philosophy.

Once again, most of the people who read my blog will be like: “What the hell is that?,” “How can such thing exist?,” “That’s rubbish.”

Well, I have to tell that what I’ve called Paris Hilton-Inspired philosophy really exists. What it is? Simple: It’s a personal-social-self esteem status that everybody, maybe deeply and even some persons may be reluctant to accept, want to achieve but just a few (which I’ll call the privileged ones) have the pleasure to experience.

People who manage to reach this evolved-thinking stage can be easily identified by a colorful-vibrant-contrasting-outgoing-outrageous-self confidence- gorgeous-charismatic-cheering-shiny-reliable personality that makes them stand out from the crowd. And when I say stand out, I mean they are always under the spotlight in every single are of their lives.

The privileged ones also reflect their personalities through a glamorous life-style. Is it all about money? Not necessarily. Money is just a little part of this personality evolution and that doesn’t necessarily mean that they are materialistic.

At this point a lot of people could say that every single rich person or celebrity have this philosophy. Well, not at all. Money may be a crucial part of this thing, but is just a little part of it. Money itself doesn’t guarantee that a person could understand or even be able to live a Paris Hilton-inspired philosophy.

The privileged ones have such a great life commitment that are able to express themselves through other means, such as fashion, but once I need to highlight that only cool people can express themselves through this ways. I mean, it’s just an extension of their personality.

Bullshit??? Not at all, or may be it is for those ones who are not confident enough with themselves as to think they are unique and special. Further than just being bullshit, its thinking positive and recognizing all of your strengths and, when possible, taking advantage of those weaknesses, you all know, just not showing them to others.

Success-focused life path is crucial. For the one that lives this life philosophy there is no other word in the dictionary but SUCCESS, no matter what it takes (Pushing one of your mates through the window, a granny, lying, whatever. OK, Just kidding, all of the previous activities are not part of these philosophy as they remain barbarian).

And well, the most difficult and at the same time the most interesting part of all is to make fun of yourself. Obviously keeping a balance, otherwise you'll be a disgusting, scary, annoying clown, which is no funny at all.

Keeping up on believing in yourself, no matter who you are. Furthermore, to understand this you just have to be proud of everysingle thing and accept it. If you are homosexual, feel proud of it. I mean, it's the trend. You don't need to grab a rainbow flag and show it to the world. (which I'd love) just show them that having different ideas and linking same sex persons is hot.

If you are silly, accept it. That can make you more intelligent than those who think nobody can recognize him/herself as an idiot. If something went wrong and everybody tell you made a mistake. THATS BULLSHIT. These people never ever make a mistake, if that happens tell you just made it in a different way. Silly are the ones who considered that doing this in different ways is a mistake.

But this stuff is too complicated to get it in just this post. Let's say TO BE CONTINUED...

Things that should be pink.

Bottles of beer: That’d be so glamorous. Just imagine holding a pink glass bottle/ Sounds fantastic!!! It would add a chic touch to a drink that a lot of people, and sometimes myself, find a little unstylish.

Cherries: Although they are chic enough, if there were pink, they would be extremely chic. And the flavor would be a little sweeter. They would be my favorites immeadiatly. Probably Michael Jackson would be a good source to find out a way to turn cherries pink. If he was able to turn himself into a pale entity, why cant cherries become PINK. Sound yummy.

Zebras: Bloody awesome. I wonder why Mother Nature didn’t think about conceiving a pink zebra. I mean flamingos are really nice, but why not a zebra??????? Obviously, I would have a pink zebra rug in my modest size-of-Texas mansion, as long as it was fake. Why should I killed such a cool animal just to make my room look better. Killing animals suck, its not nice nor trendy.